Photo from: These guys This is what I really wanted....
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
The Diet
Yes, yes, I said it: the 'D' word. It's one of the few 'D' words I don't like. I hate diets. Almost as much as I hate swimsuits. But, I've got to fix myself into a two piece very soon, and, that means, it's diet time. Yuck-O.
Today, I was craving a chocolate cupcake (don't judge), but, realizing that one cupcake will derail my weight loss plans for the next week, I opted for a chocolate protein bar instead. Let's just say, blahhhhh. It was not good. At all. And, what' worse, I still want that damn chocolate cupcake.
To ease my anger, I'm posting a beautiful picture of my wedding cake. I didn't even get to have any of it!! It looked beautiful though....
Crap. Now I want cake.
The Book!
The following is an excerpt from the book.... Our Melanie is attending a royal ball and wearing a beautiful purple ballgown with tulle, lace and satin. It's divine and the best night ever....
"I love this dress. I love that I’m wearing The Crown Jewels—oh yes I am! I’m wearing Evelina’s necklace, which makes it part of the collection. And, I’m wearing it. Me. Yes, yes, yes. My level of fabulousity is just increasing exponentially. I really could stop traffic. I can’t believe that I actually look like this—I mean, this is not the Melanie I know. This is Royal Ball Must Look Totally Fancy Melanie.
And, I secretly love her.
Funny story: I just always imagined that I’d be wearing a blue dress. You know, like Cinderella. If I were ever in a Royal Ball, wannabe Princess situation (ahem, like I am right now), I figured I’d be in a baby blue dress just like Cinderella wore to the ball—minus the glass slippers, because I’m not really sure they are that comfy, and, I’m pretty sure that my weight would totally crush them and then I’d have freaking cuts all over—not glam.
When I was little, I actually had a dream about myself wearing a blue dress with white gloves and silver shoes and dancing with some handsome man (the dream did not specify ‘prince’). I was so excited when I woke up—my mom told me that it was really me just internalizing the fact that I’d watched the movie a million times. I told her she was wrong and she would just wait and see.
I never forgot that dream. Whenever I would see a blue ballgown, I’d remember the little four year old me waking up with a huge smile and just knowing that one day, it would be real.
I guess my dream really did come true. It’s not the blue dress I imagined in my dream, but, I’ve got the gloves and the shoes and the Prince.
Wow.
Does that mean that dreams actually come true? Does that mean that my dream came true?
That even if everything in your life is really falling apart and you’re struggling to pay rent and a mortgage and your stepdad is a total tool and you’re in tears almost everyday because you miss your mother and you have no real family….That despite all that, you really can have what you always imagined?
…Really…?
You know, it’s all so perfect right now, I’m sure that I’ll take one step and just completely fall on my face. Because, it’s me. And, to put the cherry on top, I’ll do it in front of Duchess Buttface.
And that will prove that no, dreams do not in fact come true.
Because reality sucks. (who knew I was so cynical?)"
"I love this dress. I love that I’m wearing The Crown Jewels—oh yes I am! I’m wearing Evelina’s necklace, which makes it part of the collection. And, I’m wearing it. Me. Yes, yes, yes. My level of fabulousity is just increasing exponentially. I really could stop traffic. I can’t believe that I actually look like this—I mean, this is not the Melanie I know. This is Royal Ball Must Look Totally Fancy Melanie.
And, I secretly love her.
Funny story: I just always imagined that I’d be wearing a blue dress. You know, like Cinderella. If I were ever in a Royal Ball, wannabe Princess situation (ahem, like I am right now), I figured I’d be in a baby blue dress just like Cinderella wore to the ball—minus the glass slippers, because I’m not really sure they are that comfy, and, I’m pretty sure that my weight would totally crush them and then I’d have freaking cuts all over—not glam.
When I was little, I actually had a dream about myself wearing a blue dress with white gloves and silver shoes and dancing with some handsome man (the dream did not specify ‘prince’). I was so excited when I woke up—my mom told me that it was really me just internalizing the fact that I’d watched the movie a million times. I told her she was wrong and she would just wait and see.
I never forgot that dream. Whenever I would see a blue ballgown, I’d remember the little four year old me waking up with a huge smile and just knowing that one day, it would be real.
I guess my dream really did come true. It’s not the blue dress I imagined in my dream, but, I’ve got the gloves and the shoes and the Prince.
Wow.
Does that mean that dreams actually come true? Does that mean that my dream came true?
That even if everything in your life is really falling apart and you’re struggling to pay rent and a mortgage and your stepdad is a total tool and you’re in tears almost everyday because you miss your mother and you have no real family….That despite all that, you really can have what you always imagined?
…Really…?
You know, it’s all so perfect right now, I’m sure that I’ll take one step and just completely fall on my face. Because, it’s me. And, to put the cherry on top, I’ll do it in front of Duchess Buttface.
And that will prove that no, dreams do not in fact come true.
Because reality sucks. (who knew I was so cynical?)"
The Mundane
Why can't we have royal courts and ballgowns and coaches to take us away to oh-so-exciting events?? Why the heck not? I really think there is a shortage of amazingly divine women in this world (I am one of them in case you were wondering), and, well, we deserve the best. End of story.
Today, sadly, was not the say for the seven white horses to appear with a coach that started out as a pumkin and spews fairy dust everywhere. No, no, today was not that day.
It was the "please follow around kids with iPhones in the Texas heat while wearing super high heels so that you look older than 18 years old". Just in case it isn't obvious, that is not my favorite kind of day. Bo-ring.
But, I suppse we all have our days....
It's a good thing Target is open late. Sore feet? Nothing a good ol Target-a-thon can't fix. And a tan. I need a tan.
Today, sadly, was not the say for the seven white horses to appear with a coach that started out as a pumkin and spews fairy dust everywhere. No, no, today was not that day.
It was the "please follow around kids with iPhones in the Texas heat while wearing super high heels so that you look older than 18 years old". Just in case it isn't obvious, that is not my favorite kind of day. Bo-ring.
But, I suppse we all have our days....
It's a good thing Target is open late. Sore feet? Nothing a good ol Target-a-thon can't fix. And a tan. I need a tan.
The Book??
"What about this book The Shabby Princess is writing", you may ask....Well, I'll tell you! You see, it all started a very, very long time ago to be honest, little did I know that my childhood would define the rest of my life....Sadly...
My parents divorced when I was a little girl and my mom moved around a lot. Coming from a large family (she was one of six), she always told me that we moved a lot because she wanted a sense of "family". Which, I could kinda sorta get on board with. We finally settled in a nice neighborhood in a nice house with a pool and within boundaries of a great ward that had a great bishopric and amazing members. Her VT lived down the street. It was wonderful.
I was happy.
I was happy.
However, all that changed when I got older and things just weren't right all the time (not that anything ever is, but, you get the idea).
Things began to fall apart when my mother remarried and then, shortly after, died in an earthquake. Really. I know, I know. Really. Things went down hill even faster at this point--between mortgage payments, college tuition and no real family, nothing made sense.... We eventually sued the owners of the building that collapsed and a whole buncha drama followed.
Per the promtings of one of the most talented people I know, I decided to write down all the dram and, viola! We have a book.
It's a fictionalized version of my very real life. It's hilarious, and, hilariously true (sadly).
Please, get to know the main character Melanie as we follow her through the trials and tribulations of a life she didn't plan and the life she can't have back.
PS. Melanie is a princess in training as well. Isn't she fab?
(you can read a little snippet here, but please, don't take ideas or anything like that. However, feel free to tell friends about my blog--I love visitors! I don't have a copyright--I know that sounds silly, but, this is really special to me and I want to keep it that way. Thanks in advance!)
The Good Life
I live it. It's as simple as that. I live in a modern day castle, and have the most amazing friends. The only sad thing is, one cannot really pay the bills as a Princess. So, I have a regular old boring person job to pay the Visa until the book is published.
Here's some glam things about the job:
-I get to dress up all fancy pants every day
-My bosses love me (they are currently unaware that I am a Princess. Sucks for them)
-I'm good, no, GREAT at my job
-I get to write
-It's usually rather fun
Not so glam:
-Not enough time to write what I want
-The whole 9-5 thing (what?! Princesses do not follow a schedule)
-Working with students with iPhones--UGH-Snooty dumb students
-I'm easily bored
I guess that's not too bad. Anyone looking to hire a Princess full time??
"A girl should be two things: classy and fabulous"
Coco Chanel
Coco Chanel
Not too shabby....
I might be The Shabby Princess (you can refer to me as Her Royalness, Her Shabbyness- he he), but, let's be honest, I'm not too Shabby at all!
In efforts to keep friends and fam updated on my fabulously glam life and the day to day workings of being a Princess in Training and author, I thought I'd create my own site. Please check back for all the updates.
It's nice to meet you.
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