Excuse me while I panic

Have we discussed that I'm running a marathon tomorrow? Because I am. Tomorrow. Not on Sunday. Tomorrow. As in, in 24 hours, I'll be like half way into 26.2 miles.

And the panic is totally setting in.

I haven't really been eating enough carbs (gummi bears? Yes)--what if I don't have enough in the tank? What if I get really hungry at mile 9 (like I'm prone to do). What if Mystery Illness 2010 hits at mile 19? Then what?! What if I wear a tee and capris and it's too cold? What if I wear capris and a long sleeve half zip and it's too hot? What if we don't get there in time?

Full.on.panic.attack.

(I've had like 3 this week--awesome)

And it doesn't help that the headband I ordered for this marathon hasn't come yet. That's just bad juju. (which also means I'm buying one today on my lunch break. Yes, I have 50. But, I don't have one with yellow on it, and if it's warm tomorrow, I'm wearin' yellow! If it's cold, I'm wearing pink--I've got pink totally taken care of)

But! But! But! I feel excited, I feel anxious, I feel jumpy and I feel like I can tackle the world tomorrow. In the form of running 26.2 miles of course.

And, I will not have a mental breakdown at mile 17. I will not. (mile 20, maybe)

Ahh! I can't believe it.

I've slipped up and told a few people at work, but, hopefully they'll forget (doubtful).

I'm just so damn excited. Even though the finishers medals are weak (yeah, they're part of a 5 year series--in 5 years, you get a big ol' 5 point star medal thing. Really? 5 years? That's asking a lot of me. Can I just get the big 5 point star now? K, thanks).

Bonus? Tonight is graduation (yes, I get to graduate from a 21 certificate training--shut up).

I think it shall be an awesome weekend.

PS. Good luck to Sam and The Redhead who are going to rock their marathon (and Sam will rock his first 15k!) this weekend too!

Brand New Day

Last night, when I got home from class (omg, so happy to be finished. Instead of crashing the second I got home, I actually had some energy--giant weight lifted!) the fam was watching Forrest Gump on TV. Now, this is one of my favorite movies, but, my husband doesn't like it. He thinks it's all about picking on Forrest. I say that it shows that no matter what, you can live an extraordinary life and do anything and everything no matter what people say--and in the end, he has his sweet little boy. I think it's a fantastic movie. I digress. Not the point. Anyways, it was the New Years Eve scene where the one of the women says to Forrest "Don't you just love New Years? It's like everybody gets a second chance." And of course everyone applies that to December 31st/January 1st--but what about each morning when we wake up? We're often still haunted by yesterday. I know I'm guilty of that.

Yesterday was an awful day. Downright scary. And awful. And all the other likeminded terms that could go along with "sucky". But! Today is a new day.

I had a great run this morning and only screwed myself by stopping to walk at one point which then just killed my motivation--but! I only stopped to walk because I was like "man, I should really stop for a second, I'm almost done and haven't stopped yet". So, that was encouraging. (why did I stop?!?!)

Anyways! I'm rambling (I like to ramble, this is a problem). But! Here's where I'm trying to go with all this: a long lost childhood BFF of mine sent me this quote in an e-mail last night and I wanted to share it with all of you. I don't know where it came from, who said it, etc, but, she sent it to me and it just made my heart sing that I wanted to share singing happy hearts with y'all: (and, please note my comments in bold--because y'all know I can't not comment)

"May today there be peace within. May you trust that you are exactly where you are meant to be (even if you feel 100% like that's not true, pretty much how I feel--but, I'm trying to find peace within the storm). May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith in yourself and others. May you use the gifts that you have received, and pass along the love that has been given to you (we all have love to share--make some cookies, share a smile--it helps us all). May you be content with yourself just the way you are (I'm working on this--even though I'm still not at my goal weight and far from it, I feel stronger and I feel like I look better...Maybe I'm not meant to be a size whatever anymore). Let this knowledge settle into your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love. It is there for each and every one of us."

Happy Tuesday y'all! Now, go forth and sing, dance, and praise!

Marathon Monday

Well, I know it's not technically Marathon Monday, but, it's my Marathon Monday gosh darn it!

The CowTown is Saturday (I big time puffy heart Saturday races) and it's so weird because I don't feel like I have a marathon this weekend, which is a good thing, and a bad thing. Good because I'm not stressing about it, bad because I've got so much other crap going on this week I'm stressing about that instead. Oh, and, I'm still sick. Sheesh.

But, I did manage to get in a kick booty final "long run" on Saturday. It was a lot harder (and hillier!) than I had anticipated, but, the harder the training runs, the better the races, right? (just agree with me here, K?)

I'm ready. I'm ready to run. I'm ready to PR. I'm ready to have fun.

I'm ready to run on my home turf and to giddily drive home with that post marathon glow (that's also called sweat, fyi) to my puppies and crash on the sofa with them before getting take out and watching movies with my family (yes, I have high expectations for my post marathon weekend).

The clothes are picked out, the gear is ready. Now, the weather just needs to cooperate and we'll be fine. None of this scattered showers and 39 degree high nonsense. I don't enjoy that. I'm constantly freezing and do not want to run 26.2 miles in layers, understand Weather Gods?

So, it's Monday.

The Monday before I marathon. Again.

Eeek! Wish me luck. (I'm still kinda scared)

Congratulations, Universe, you win (again) (as always)

So, in 8 days I'll be running a marathon (because I'm crazy) (and like torture) (and am really just a show off).

Since the start of 2010, I have been 150% more dedicated to my training than I was in 2009. Which is awesome pants, if you ask me (and, by reading my blog, you did in fact, ask me). Of course, 26.2 miles is a long freaking way and anything can go wrong anywhere along there. Trust me, I know.

So, I've been trying to get good solid runs in and good strength training, etc. I'm feeling strong, confident (but not overly so--I'm still scared to death!) and good. Which had made me just that much more exicted about running in general. Which is the point, right? Right.

Until Wednesday night.

When I got hit with mystery illness 2010. (it's actually the same thing that haunted me in 2009, but, it's now 2010, so....)

And a cold.

I spent the entire day in bed yesterday (and there was nothing good on TV. I can only watch curling for so long--why I have missed the ski jumping events is a mystery) except for the 20 minutes that I thought it would be a good idea to go for a run in my new Brooks tech tee. Because obviously, I need to try it out. (obviously)

Lesson? Do not attempt running whilst hopped up on DayQuil, pain meds and the like. It's not a fun experience. Even if your pace was super speedy, you'll be too sick and generally out of it to enjoy the euphoria.

(but the tech tee totally rocked)

So, I didn't get my miles for the week and I'm still sick.

Oh well.... Excuse to eat too much and gain even more weight? Yes.

(I swear I'm thisclose to swallowing a tapeworm a la Kelly on The Office) (not really cause that's ick) (maybe I do the Emily Blunt from The Devil Wears Prada: "Well, I don't eat anything and then when I feel like I'm going to pass out, I eat a cube of cheese") (I'm lactose intolerant) (sure)

The goings on....

Things have been pretty lame around here lately and for that I apologize. Bad news? Don't expect it to get any more exciting in the near future. Yes, my life is just that awesome right now (read: actaully super boring). I'm hoping upon hope for an update on a possible new fabulous opportunity, but, am less optimistic than I was a week ago (::breaks down in tears like a little child and screams 'why!'::). So, that's obnoxious and sucky and stupid. Stupid.

But! I'm less than 2 weeks out from The Cowtown and although my right hip is a touch sore, it's nothing that ice, stretching and foam rolling can't cure. I feel great running wise, I feel strong and am excited. I really want to PR, which honestly, after the mental breakdown at mile 17 of Tulsa, I'm hoping I should be able to do that for crying out loud, but, hey, you never know. I've put in some challenging training runs this time--yes, I wasn't training for 24 weeks like I did for Tulsa (err, 6 weeks?) but, I'm kicking some serious booty and although the snow sloooowed me waaaay down last week, it was still a might bit faster than my last 20 miler for Tulsa, so, yay!

Also, Catalina! We're like thisclose to having our flights, hotels and boats all figured out. Who knew it would be difficult? Looks like we'll be hanging out on the island all day Friday which will be a great stress reliever and we'll head back to the "mainland" on Sunday morning since the last boat is at like 5 on Saturday and I fully expect to take 8 hours to finish the marathon and I don't need to rush to get on a boat less than 1 hour after the finish! But, I'm really excited. My first race of the year for Operation Jack! Yippee!

My sweet husband got me a lovely necklace for Valentine's Day--it's a silver butterfly and I love it. Hummingbirds have always kind of been "our thing" (we got married at The Hummingbird House), but, I love the butterfly. It's dainty and perfect. Turtles are my running guys, but, maybe I can include butterflies too?

I'm in the home stretch of class and only one more session before graduation. I can't wait. Nothing like an extra piece of paper to hang on my wall to remind people of how smart I am. Obviously.

What will I do with all that extra time? (probably watch TV)

Also, I'm addicted to the Olympics. I am such a cheeseball. I don't even care who wins most of the time, I just get so excited cheering on all those athletes. I keep telling my husband he needs to look into curling or something--I'm sure they make some $$, yes? But really, cannot turn off the Olympics.

I went to the opening ceremonies in SLC and let me tell you--there is nothing like watching your country enter the stadium in your colors, with your flag--whew--I balled my eyes out. But! In my defense, there wasn't a dry eye in the place--this was our Olympics. Also, coldest day of my life--we ordered hot chocolate and chili and by the time we sat down (3 minutes +/-) it was ice cold (I should note that it was steaming and boiling when we picked it up!). Stupid Vancouver being indoors--that is not hardcore guys.

I kind of wish I was there.

I'm a nerd.

Any other Olympic nerds out there? What did you do for Valentine's Day?

PS. Have you donated lately? Please help me raise funds for Train 4 Austism as I join Operation Jack in my marathon efforts this year. Want to help me run Catalina with pride? Donate today. Every little bit helps. Click here to donate today. Thank you.

20 snowy miles (or why I will rock The Cowtown)

So, if you haven't heard, it snowed here. Woke up to INCHES on Thursday morning and it didn't stop until Friday morning. Luckily, we got a snow day--downside was it wasn't announced until I was literally in my driveway on the way to work (couldn't get out of my driveway anyway, but, that's besides the point). Sleeping in fail. Boo! And, because I'm a child, I am so wildly excited by the snow and really haven't shut up about how pretty it is in 3 days.

Snow or otherwise, I had a 20 miler on the schedule today. My last (er, first?) before The Cowtown. I knew my trail would be a snowy, muddy, tree trashed fiasco, so I had to find another route to get to the clubhouse. Enter the husband who suggests a route he rides his bike on. "It's hilly, but, not too bad" he says "and, the hills will help you in Catalina" (also, Cowtown has a 1 mile hill climb at mile 24--how mean is that?). So, I shall embrace the hills.

Did I mention the route involves all the hills at the first 3 miles? Doesn't sound that bad in theory until you've trashed your legs by mile 7 and have 13 left. Not that I know from personal experience or anything.

Let's break it down shall we:

0-1: Ohh, look at all the pretty snow. Snow, snow, snow. Snowmen. Snowpeople. Snow, snow, lovely snow. I love the snow. La, la, snowy, snowy winter wonderland.
1-3: More snow. Look! There's no one on the road, I can run on the faux sidewalk created by road construction. Ohh, non snowy and safe. Yay! Crap. Must.go.up.a.hill. Am I stil climbing this hill? Where does it end? Phew. It's over. La, la, running through happy pretty neighborhood, la, la--hill! Stupid blasted hill. I hate this hill. This hill is even longer. Less steep, but, it's like 500 times as long. Valley--weeeeee! Hill. Stupid hill that I hate and that I avoid when running with the group. Kiilllll me. Whew. Up the hill. La, la, down the hill. La, la, la. Crap. Stoplight is out. Let us play chicken whilst crossing 6 lanes of traffic, yes? Yes. I'm alive.
3-5: Made it to the lake! Lovely lake. With snow. Mmm, snowcones. Um. Um. All the lights are out. Um. I'm literally the only person here. Please no murders, please. Just keep running, just keep running. Run faster you idiot! Outrun the murders! (also, they'd have to be some seriously dedicated murders to be out in this nonsense)
5-7: Thank the Lord, there are people. They're just as insane as I am. Yay for crazies! I am kicking this runs ass. My legs hurt though. Maybe I shouldn't have charged 3 miles of hills? Perhaps. I rock anyway.
7-9: Oh fantastic, the route we're taking today is the hill training route. Thank you Universe, you win, yet again. Hands are giant ice pops. Apparently, stopping at the clubhouse turns then into giant frozen clubs. Oh look, snow. Avoid the snow. Run single file. Look, I'm at the back. Shocking. Feet are wet. Hands are cold. Anger.
9-10: Oh look, another hill! And another. At least there are pretty houses to look at. Oh! I like that one. Can I have that one?
10-11: Fantastic. More snow. Step lightly kids! Ugh. It's like evil mud. And slippery. Slippery cold stupid mud.
11-13: Yay! Hands are not giant icepops anymore (did I just jinx myself?). Ugh. Legs are dead. My butt is cold. Cannot keep up. Run harder. Please water stop, please! Waterstop! I'm keeping up again. Avoid snow. Avoid snow=run on sidewalk? Not our best collective decision. Step lightly! Oh, hamstrings officially hate me. I'm totally going to slip and fall into the street and get hit by a car. Because the avoiding snow thing? Yeah, we ended up in more snow. I hate snow.
13-14: Did I mention how much I hate running in snow? Because I do. It's evil. Pretty, but evil. Like a supermodel or something (not that supermodels are evil, but, you know what I mean).
14-17: No more snow! YAY! Just keep running, just keep running. We're all exhausted. When our rockstar super hero pacer is starting to fade--here's your sign. I'm being told to call it a day at 17 and that someone will take me home. So, so tempting. But no! I am hardcore! I will make it to 20.
17-18: Longest effing mile of my life. Am alone. Am bored. Am cold. Am stuck in snow again.
18-19: Run fast you idiot, the faster you run, the faster you are done! Weeee! Quick, quick. Turn up iPod and rock out. Happy running.
19-20.25: Stupid snow. Stupid .10 mile bridge covered in snow. Must basically walk across bridge lest I fall (again--did I not mention that?) and break ankle/leg/hip. Stupid snow. Success! Across the bridge! Warn fellow runners. Am such a good citizen. Oh look. More snow. Almost there! Left, right, left, right. Left! Right! Run down the hill. YAY! Car! Warm car! I did it.

UGH! 20.25 miles. Awesome. It felt so much better than my 20 milers while training for Tulsa. Yes, the snow totally sucked and I would so much rather run in sub freezing weather (not sub zero! I mean below 32. It was like 34 today) than run in the snow--it was so hard. Not something I wish to repeat. The run was hard. It was hilly, it was challenging, it was cold--but, it was probably one of the best runs I've had in a while. I never worried about the distance (so much easier to break up--7 miles to clubhouse, 10 miles with the group, 3 miles alone), I just felt great. At mile 10 I remember thinking how bitter I was 10 miles into my last 20 mile training run in the fall and was so happy that I felt good (as good as one can feel). So, yay!

On another totally unrelated note, being short sucks. I took in some clothes to have altered=$64 later....

Sheesh.

And. And. And! I found 6 (yes, 6, I pulled them out and counted!) gray hairs today. Gray! I'm too young to be going gray. This is horsecrap.

I'm still a bit shaken up (not kidding) about the whole incident. May have gone overboard with buying haircolor today.

Seriously.

The awesome 20 miler gets cancelled by the gray (again, Universe, YOU WIN).

Happy Saturday y'all--and Happy Valentine's Day. Love all my blog friends so much!

Hi, I'm 80 years old

That's to say that I now regularly fall asleep around 8PM.

Totally missed Lost last night (and um, last week too--shut up). And slept in this morning.

Apparently, getting up at 5 on Monday, running 9 miles, going to work, going to class (and being the last group finished! arg! 10:30PM my ass!) and then getting up on Tuesday, running 7.5 miles, going to work, running errands--will cause you to crash. This whole class + marathon training + work + other responsibilities + being a wife/friend/sister/daughter thing is exhausting.

Only a few more weeks of class. Of course, class ends the week after Cowtown. Sure.

And the week of Cowtown? Insane crazy, crazy. Why do I end up running marathons in the midst of craziness? Is this some sort of Universe vs. me game? Because obviously, the Universe is winning (hear that Universe? You totally win. Now, can we play nice?).

But! But! But! I can hang on until then.

I think.

Also, it's freezing outside, and so naturally, I'm wearing a cute scarf. Problem: it smells all sorts of funky. Ick.

Please tell me that I'm not the only pseudo old person out there? Or am I just old?

Running Loves

or the things that I obsess over the things that regularly deplete my checking account.

It's no secret I love running. I absolutely adore it. Which is why when I was sick over the weekend and didn't manage to run (let's not talk about it, k?) I actually spent the rest of the weekend in tears and major depression. I had let myself down. I've run sick before! I've run injured, exhausted, 24 hours out of the hospital--you name it. But, ::knocks on wood:: I've been blessed this training cycle and couldn't risk messing it all up because of my stupidity (which we all know I am 100% capable of). (still pretty damn pissed off at myself though) (although, I ran this morning which was awesome considering I can rarely pull myself out of bed on Monday mornings) (oh, and then I lifted weights at lunch. And spent 30 minutes looking for parking near my office after that outing)

I finally pulled myself together for a quick Valentine's shopping trip and a trip to REI for hiking boots (omg, don't get me started--short story: 2 days after running up hill upon hill in Catalina, I'm taking a group of teenagers on a 3 day hike in the muddy N. Texas woods. Did I mention I have to pull a handcart? And get no soda? yeahhh.... hiking boots= it's really happening).

While at REI, I loaded up on ShotBloks and the like as I gear up for marathons and long runs which led me to this lovely list of things that make my running hall of fame (or, loves).

With Valentine's Day less than a week away, here are some of my running loooooves:

Fuel Belts: Cannot go more than 8 miles without one. I get dehydrated like whoa, so, I needs me some water. If it's anything less than 8, I can make it with the water fountains along my neighborhood or at the lake, anything longer and I freak the heck out.

Cliff Shot Bloks: With caffeine please! These babies pull me through pre-dawn treadmill workouts (I eat one or two before leaving the house--they amp me up enough to where I know I better just go to the gym, otherwise I'll just lay in bed wide awake=fail), races and long runs. Sure, not the tastiest, but, at mile 9 of a run/race, I'm hungry and need somethin' to keep me going. They do the trick.

Powerade Zero: Goes in my fuelbelt for long runs and races and is my beverage of choice Friday-Sunday as I prepare and recover from long runs. (I usually dilute it a bit with water)

Nike shorts/capris/pants: I wear a lot of on-sale or less expensive running gear, but, my Nike bottoms are my hands down favorites and one of the few things I will pay full price for. Not too tight, dry material and they last. Love them (and I just bought a new pair over the weekend since I wear my capris all.the.time and never seem to have a clean pair. Solution? More pairs!)

My Garmin: Yes, I'm a Garmin junky. I get all twitchy and weird without it. For real. I don't have a great ability to pace myself (yet) and having the pace alerts is really helpful. And it's sad that I kind of live for the little jingle of it ticking off another mile. (honestly, sweetest sound in the world on a long run)

Body Glide: I'm the queen of weird chaffing (my lower back?!) and do not go out without this stuff. There's nothing worse than being mid way into a good run only to be hit with some nice chaffing. It kind of ruins it all from that point (at least for me). I forgot it a few weeks ago and was hurting major by the time I got home.

Tech/Dri tees: Best.invention.ever. I'm not brand picky on these, they rock no matter what. How I ever ran in cotton will forever be a mystery (of course this was back when I wasn't running all that long, but, still!)

Compression socks: I fully attribute my success in this training cycle to these bad boys. I bought them 3 weeks before my first marathon and pretty much wear then after anything 6 miles or more. I'm injury prone and battled a nasty calf injury for months and these have really made a huge difference in recovery and overall soreness. I fully recommend these to anyone.

SweatyBands headbands: Obviously, these are lady specific, and they are my favorite. They aren't too tight (I find the Goody ones to be too tight) and they have fun patterns and prints and have a soft underpart that keeps them locked on your noggin. I wore one in my Nov. 1 half marathon, my first marathon and on 90% of my training runs. My current favorite print is my green one with blue turtles--turtles are my running symbol, if you will.

Well, lovelies, there you have it, my running loves. (there are many, many more as my closet and gym bag would tell you, but, that's a nice lil summary, yes?)

Now, I'm dying to hear, what are some of yours??

10 reasons I should totally be a spy

So, last night I had to do some spy work via my job, and I wasn't really looking forward to it because lying is not something I love to do (I realize this clashes with my 'reasons I should be a spy', but, whatever).

But, I had no choice so I sucked it up and put on a happy face. Let me just tell you, the lovely people from a rival had me like putty in their hands--I was ready to pack up and move to Arkansas. Free tuition? And you're going to pay me? And I get a guaranteed job? Sign me the heck up.

If I had any desire to work in those specific industries, you can bet your bottom dollar I would have signed in blood for that deal. Yes, even leaving behind my beloved house--kids, that's how desperate things are around here. I'm willing to go back to school and move to Arkansas. Who am I? (not that I have anything against Arkansas, I actually quite like it, I just can't imagine leaving my house, my city and my life here)

On that note, since I was so awesome at my sneaky spy skills, I'm pretty sure that's the field I'm cut out for.

Watch out Michael Westen.

1. I'm nondescript--I mean, really, who's going to to suspect a little readheaded girl? No one. Obviously, I'm innocent.

2. I'm tough. I took kickboxing for like 6 months (which automatically makes me a badass). I could roundhouse your ass. I mean, I might be short, and not particularly fast, but, I bet I could outrun a terrorist or bad guy. I mean, can they run 26.2 miles? Probably not.

3. I enjoy foreign travel, dressing up and whatnot. I'd be happy to learn to languages and tackle accents. Just sayin'.

4. I might have gluten and lactose sensitivities, but, I'm willing to pretty much eat anything, so, I'd be fine in the mountains of Afghanistan or whatever.

5. My dad is a chemist and I like to cook, thus, I'm pretty sure I could come up with poisons and explosives and stuff that the others guys wouldn't expect (poisoned warm chocolate chip cookies, anyone?).

6. My dad? Also a pyrotechnic. I'm good with explosives. I could figure out C4.

7. I like fancy cars. I'm willing to drive an Aston Martin for the team.

8. I could live pretty much anywhere (except Siberia, don't send me to Siberia).

9. I'm a quick learner--for real. And a good memory.

10. James Bond, Jason Bourne, Michael Westen, anyone? Sign me up.

See, obviously, I'm overqualified. I'm not really one for office jobs anyway.

Where's the dotted line?

Love, love, love

Since it is after all the month of loooove with Valentine's Day and all, and since I'm feeling especially happy and sappy today (thanks in part to my kick ass 6 miler--dude, in 54 minutes, that's like super fast for me--this was also intervals, so, that's my overall time, but, whatever) I thought I'd ramble about a few things that I love right now (and since happiness is fleeting this week--ugh, work, work, job, bleh! we better take it while we can)

In no particular order...

The crazy happy sounds my Ella Mae beagle makes whenever I come home. It's like "Hi, hi, hi Mom! You're home. I missed you so. What if you never came back? Squirrel!". Makes me so happy.

Boxer wiggles. If you've ever seen a boxer, you know they're wiggle machines, and my Butchie boy is no exception.

Hand me down family heirloom quilts like the one currently on my bed. Handmade (handmade!) by my grandma.

Snuggling on said quilt before bed with the beagle. She gets in bed early and waits for me as we're both early to bed. Me because I wake up to run, she just needs a good 11hrs+ for her beauty sleep.

Candles. My collection is out of control!

Chips & salsa. My snack of choice and a dietary staple as far as I'm concerned!

Congratulations on a job well done (rare, like Bigfoot, but, still, very exciting).

The Dallas Running Club. I love those crazies. Wouldn't have run a marathon without them!

Blog friends--y'all rock my face off! I heart you big time. Be my Valentine?

Horribly tacky but super warm sweatshirts. No shame in my game, kids.

Chocolate. Another dietary staple. Nope, couldn't be a vegan--I've made peace with that.

Diet Coke. Cause really, y'all don't want to see me without it.

Vacations. We finally might be able to go on one! It looks like Florida or Mexico this summer (we haven't booked anything because we're currently still trying to figure out how on God's green earth we are going to get to Catalina, get to the race, get off the island, and get home. It's kind of a drama and using all our travel energy).

Marathons. Marathons equal finisher shirts and medals. And hopefully, a present from the hubs. (he spoils me just a bit)

Cute movies. Currently obsessed with Up. The dog? Yeah, that's Ella Mae. "Please oh please be my prisoner!". Love it!

Cookies. Because who doesn't love cookies? I currently can't make any because I'm out of regular sugar! Brown sugar? Check? Powdered? 3 bags--check! White cane sugar? Notsomuch. WTF.

Sleep. Yep, there, I said it. If there was a job in which I could sleep, I'd be so awesome at it it's not even funny.

Now, what about you, what are some things you love? (besides me, of course)

Say what you will

aka, "yes, I'm fully aware that I'm crazy. Thanks".

Last night, I forked over the cash and signed up for The Cowtown Marathon.

I thought about it all weekend and I thought about my training for Tulsa and I thought about how much better I feel now than I did 25 days out from Tulsa and about how I just feel better about running and yes it will probably be 150% detrimental to me in Catalina, but, I can't run Catalina for time, it's basically all uphill--and, a week post Tulsa I felt great (hoping that translates to two weeks post Cowtown). Obviously, I'm hoping I'll be feeling up to the challenge of Catalina, but, I also hope that Cowtown will give me a much needed confidence booster before those 26.2 miles of hills on a damn island. I'm actually going to great lenghts for torture!

Also, this will be the first and only marathon this year that I'll run at home. I'll get to wake up in my own bed, eat my happy normal breakfast, run my heart out, hop in the car, drive home, eat at my favorite restaurants and nap in my bed versus the car. This is reason enough people. Plus, I've totally picked out my post marathon food (since post Tulsa was McD's french fries and ice cream--don't judge, it was sooooo good!) (this time it will include a burger from Jake's and fro yo from I Heart Yogurt where one of my sweet youth girls works).

I accept that it may be a huge mistake, but, I'm not telling anyone (except you guys!)--no one from work knows, etc so, there's no added pressure. And, it's a Saturday marathon which means I can be back to work on Monday.

I think it's kind of perfection.

Yes, I'm still scared. Yes, 26.2 is a long way (I know, I've been there). But, with a successful 18 miler under my belt and time enough to get two 20 mile runs in, I know I can handle it. And honestly, I'm probably not going to PR at this, and that's fine with me (which is sad considering I had a total meltdown in Tulsa which probably cost me a good 10 minutes or so). 26.2 mile training run, I do believe.

Yes, my knees might kill and my IT band might hurt like the dickens (although, kids, honestly, soooo much better than I felt at the beginning of November--seriously) but, I'm so looking forward to Catalina and know that it will seriously kick my butt that anything before that is childs play.

I have a body that can run (for the time being) so I might as well take advantage of that. It's not like I have anything else that exciting going on in my life right now.

Plus, I'm just so gosh darn excited! (and that always helps)

So, shh, don't tell anyone. This is our little secret.

Anatomy of an 18 mile run

Scene: alarm goes off at 5:15 on Saturday (as it does every Saturday) and I hit snooze (as I do every Saturday). Lie in bed for 3 minutes before getting up. Look outside to make sure it has stopped snowing. It has. Check the weather via the Blackberry. 25 right now with a high of 34 today. Not going to warm up while I'm running. Get dressed, go outside to do a temperature check. I'm always one of the runners who gets accused of being overdressed, but, I very rarely get too hot in the fall and winter. So, I go in to change--overdressed? Maybe. I don't care! (was so not overdressed)

Off I go!

0-0.5 Mile: OK, not too bad. It's cold, but, I'm warming up. Good thing I changed. La, la, la lovely running. Thank goodness the trail is open, la, la, la. Step in giant mud sink hole. Awesome, freezing feet. Run in grass to avoid frozen mud on trail. I'm officially hardcore.
0.5-1.0 Mile: Headband slips off, reach for headband and lose an earbud. Yikes--what's that sound? I'd know that sound anywhere. Coyotes. Awesome. I see them all the time at night, but, I'm the only person on this trail at 5:30 AM. Run faster.
1.0-2.0 Mile: Have outrun the coyotes (side note: full moon) only to hear barking dogs. This part of the trail skirts kind of a rough neighborhood. I'm picturing being attacked by packs of rabid dogs that control most major cities. (yes, stupid movie reference, I'm 5) Run faster.
2.0-6.0 Mile: Safely escaped death via dogs and have made it to the lake. It's not too cold and I take my hood off several times to cool down. Arrive at the clubhouse and meet up with the rest of the crazies.
6.0-8.00 Mile: Holy mother of all things I will die here. The temperature has dropped and now it's windy. My hands are so cold that they're hot and I can't move them. And yes I'm wearing gloves. And yes, I'm wiggling my fingers trying to warm them up. It hurts so bad I think I might die. Hate running, hate, hate, hate running.
8.00-10.00 Mile: Try to talk with the running friends to keep my mind off the mind numbing cold. Everyone agrees although it's not the coldest day temperature wise, the wind is killer. My face is numb.
10.00 Mile: Stop for water and fuel. Water fountains are all frozen (I had water with me). My shot blocks are frozen. My face is so numb that when I try to talk, I sound like a drunk slurring her words.
10.00-15.00 Mile: Running buddies force conversation so we don't all end up like me. Rounding another corner of the lake we're out of the wind and things are not as miserable. Did I mention there was a half marathon going on that day? Crazies.
15:00-18.00 Mile: Have said adios to running buddies and must venture out into the cold world alone to meet my husband. Run a mile into the wind to get to the turnaround point. Want to die. Hands are just giant ice pops at this point. Finally get turned around--only 2 miles! I can do this! No, I really can't. I'm hungry, I'm cold, my legs are shutting down. This involved lots of stopping. The racers inspire me to keep going and I run my little heart out to the parking lot where I'm to meet my husband. Who, by the way isn't there.

Post 18.00 miles: Wait a few minutes for the husband who's stuck in race day traffic. Thaw out in the car and inhale a bowl of oatmeal when I get home--usually not my post run meal but by goly I was cold! Hottest shower ever + slippers + sweats = semi warm.

I wasn't nearly as sore as I thought I'd be and although it literally was one of the hardest runs of my life, I felt great afterwards and really, really proud of myself. (because I'm not used to running in this weather and all)

Sidenote, I'm having dreams about marathons, so, I think I'm signing up for The Cowtown Marathon today (it's only 26 days away--holy hell!).